Happy Thanksgiving!

Big holidays often go badly for me. I think it's mostly getting a lot of people together in one place that tends to stress me out. But I also have a little bit of the "it's never quite as good as I sometimes imagine ahead of time" syndrome, so I get a little down around the holidays (you'd think I'd have adjusted my expectations by now, but whatever).

Today was fine, except for the part where I started sobbing while cooking with my sister. Random sobbing happens every so often when I'm feeling stressed by something. More disconcerting was the fact that my sister, while vaguely supportive, also seemed to wish I and my problems would just disappear. Which of course was really all I wanted to do. And I can't really blame her. I'd probably feel the same after this many years. In any case, I knew that I would just feel worse if I skipped the big dinner. And I would also be avoiding something that makes me anxious, never good.

Anyway, we came out the other side of the crying jag, the dinner was fine (until my aunt left in anger, but she does that at every.family.event.every.year, so that was nothing new). Ahh, family. Ahh, holidays.