The good thing: for the first time in a good long while, my fear of getting a cold seems to have mellowed out a bit. I've been going to meetings without fear and touching paperwork from other people without feeling an urge to wash my hands afterward. I had a meeting about grant writing at the health clinic yesterday, and drove by my sister's house site (again), this time in the rain.
But I've also been doing a lot of general ruminating, revolving mostly around other people either being mad at me or thinking badly of me. Today, I had a miscommunication with a coworker, but I didn't realize it. By the time I did, it wasn't possible to clear it up. For a couple of hours, my mind stewed on the fact that she might think I was a bad person. (The miscommunication involved a cupcake. Really. This blog has made me aware of the large role baked goods play in my life. Who knew?)
Anyway, at lunchtime, while eating my cupcake, I looked on an OCD forum, and found people discussing just letting feelings like that hang around: not trying to get rid of them, but also not giving them more attention than they deserve. Just treating it like any of the hundreds of thoughts that pass through my head on any given day. That's easier said than done, of course, but it's actually worked quite well today. I've been able to apply it to a similar worry that's been hanging around for a few days. So, all in all, a decent day. If only the stomach flu weren't going around...
My Apologies!
4 years ago
This inspired me this morning when I was in a tug of war with my thoughts and sensations at the grocery store! I hear you on the baked goods too. . .
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