I've been doing awesome at basic contamination exposures at home and work in the last couple of months.
Now I'm moving on to the scariest piece for me: exposing myself to people who have a cold or stomach flu. I've been struggling with this one for several years now. It makes it difficult to have a social life, because people with colds are everywhere!
Today I went to the grocery store. In the middle of checking me out, my clerk got a tissue and blew her nose. I did freak at first, and I threw my receipt away before leaving the store. But then when I got home, my keys weren't in the pocket I thought, so I had to touch four different pockets with my "contaminated" hand before I found them.
Then I figured to heck with it. I touched my hair and my face, my pillow, computer keyboard, refrigerator handle, and sock and underwear drawer with those contaminated hands. I have NEVER been able to do this before, and my hands were shaking during some of it.
I feel great, kinda, but my anxiety, while lower, is still heightened. I can't undo it now, though, so I'll just have to wait it out.
OCD and SSRI-Induced Apathy
6 days ago