It's been literally a year that I've been saying to myself, "If you get a cold this week, it will be terrible, just continue your avoidance until next week and everything will be okay then."
By now, I'm fully aware that next week won't be any more cold-friendly, so I'm trying to continue my exposures.
Today I woke up to the choice of driving my car to work or taking the bus. Both felt so fraught with contamination possibilities that I really just wanted to call in sick. But I didn't. I took the bus, and I did get "contaminated," but I'm hanging in. Not getting a whole lot of work done, but I still have the afternoon ahead of me.
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You are stronger than you think!
7 months ago
Yay for going to work and hanging in there! That takes courage. I'm wondering if you could try exposures to the thoughts that it would be terrible to get a cold and get someone else sick? That seems to drive a lot of the obsessing--the sheer terror that those thoughts hold for you.
ReplyDeleteYes, I think you're right. That fear is always out there, but I don't take the time to really sit with it and let the anxiety peak (because it's no fun, of course).
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