Wednesday, October 3, 2012

A Solid Exposure Week

Yesterday I learned that my office's health fair was to be held right next door to an event providing outreach services to homeless veterans. I spent the next hour thinking of why I didn't really want to attend anyway, before realizing that this was a great opportunity to "run toward fear." Not to mention that the route of the bus I ride all the time ends at a homeless shelter, so it's not like I'm ever going to avoid hanging out with lots of homeless people.

But then in the end, I had meetings scheduled during the whole event. So, oh well. But as of this morning I had expected to attend, and wasn't feeling any anxiety about it, so I'm going to count it anyway. :)

Over the next few days, I've got lunches planned with a former colleague and my mom. I'm feeling a high level of anxiety over both, as there's some uncertainty and newness involved in both plans. Today I found myself trying to rearrange schedules and plans to pick things/times/places that felt "safer." So my goal for these few days is to let it play out however it does, without stage managing it.

In terms of causing impacts in my life, my fear over social events is probably the worst aspect of my OCD. I avoid them because I can't control the schedule, and there may be sick people, or people that I could get sick, etc, etc. Between ruining my social life and causing hours of anxiety, it's worth focusing my efforts on. Especially as we move into cold and flu season.

3 comments:

  1. Congratulations for being willing to go to the health fair, even though it ended up you couldn't go. I would count that as a victory!

    Focusing on your social life seems like a good idea since it causes such distress. I have trouble in that area, too. I'll be rooting for you!

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  2. Sounds like you are moving right along, Ann! Keep it up - you are doing awesome! Good luck with your lunches. I know you can do it. : )

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  3. I have the same feeling about germs they give me panic attacks and I always have to have hand sanitizer. Glad to see that I'm not alone

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