My job isn't a super stressful one, and I don't have huge amounts of responsibility. It does have some stress and some responsibility, however, centered around budget cuts and dealing with federal funding. My workplace is very ethical. But there are lots of places where judgment calls are made, and every time an issue requiring judgment (or more often, a change from the PRIOR decision) arises, I become convinced that disaster will strike. These disasters always end up with me or my boss in jail (where she blames me), or sometimes I end up fired, or sometimes we just spend hours and hours and hours straightening up the mess I cause and everyone hates me, and we have to pay lots of money back. It's all fabulous to ruminate over.
There's no physical exposure possible for this one, it really calls for a script. I don't have a good track record with using scripts in ERP, because I'm not good at focusing when I try. But I really need to go there. This is one of those situations where it's become so clear that there's just zero point in spending hours worrying about something that will not likely come to pass; even if it did come to pass, I can't do anything about at all until it actually DOES.
So, that's a big goal for the new year: meditation and scripts, woohoo.
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You are stronger than you think!
1 year ago
Those are great goals.
ReplyDeleteI worry about those things at work too. I used to be a public servant, implementing all kinds of state rules and regulations, and now with my current job, my focus is on being accurate and fair. I am very conscientious, as I figure you and many of us with OCD are. But I still worry about messing up and getting fired or sued.
I don't know much about how scipts work, but perhaps if you carry such ruminations out to a point where it is completely silly (like, you're in jail, your boss is in an adjoinging cell, a network is calling about doing a reality show about the situation, etc.) it might make you laugh and worry a bit less. I do that sometimes.
I love reading your posts because you are so "in tune" to your OCD and know exactly what you need to do.......I look forward to reading about your successful scripts in the coming year!
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